Nightlight Volunteers turn Tragedy into Hope

Three months ago and on the other side of the globe, a 2-year-old African orphan named Vivian died of bacterial meningitis. While the news might not seem so out of the ordinary considering the continent’s state of affairs, Vivian’s death was a blow to two local residents who had met and come to love the Ugandan toddler.

Temecula residents Kellie Falk and Courtney Atnip had traveled to Uganda last October to visit the orphanage where Vivian lived and deliver supplies and comfort to the toddler and others staying at the facility. There, they fell in love with little Vivian, Falk said.

(…finish reading at North County Times)

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Posted in Media, Orphan Care / Adoption, Uganda Adoption, Uganda Mission Trip, Uganda Orphanage | Leave a comment

2011 5k for Adoption Awareness

Thanks to all the runners that came out on June 11th for our 3rd Annual 5K. We felt that it was a very successful year and we have learned much for next year’s race. We had a total of 211 runners that came out in support of our 5K! Nightlight also raised $5,000 from our sponsors and registrants! Thank you to all of our runners, sponsors and 5K committee that made all this possible!

Race results and awards have been posted at It’s About Time. Many thanks to Tiffany Anne Photography for the lovely photos taken at the event — from start to finish! Here are three photos, ans you can view many of the photos at our 5k page.

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CDC: Lead Exposure and International Adoption

Children recently adopted from overseas may have been exposed to lead. Ask your doctor for a lead test! Click here

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Uganda Mission Trip June 2011

Kate and Ben

The Nightlight team has been in Uganda for 3 days, and I am just now getting around to updating the blog. We have had 3 very busy days and last night, we had a black out in the evening. There are so many wonderful stories to share of God’s grace and love and, I’m certain there will be many more throughout the week.

We began work at the baby’s home on Monday by painting murals on the walls and turning the garage into an office. Everyone has worked very hard and the results are quite impressive. We have all grown more attached daily to the children at Tender Hearts. The children warmed up to us much faster this time as well. We are constantly humbled by their sweet faces and the love they show us which is so innocent and tender. Today, we gave the nannies the afternoon off and cared for the children under Cathy’s direction. We learned that the nannies are amazing women who accomplish much every day. By the time they returned, we were exhausted and the baby’s home was in disarray.

Our team is truly wonderful. Everyone has worked very hard and has shown the love of Christ to everyone we have met. We have had devotion each night and been unable to avoid tears each time. We are so blessed by the presence of the Lord each day.

Tomorrow we are going to survey the land where the future baby’s home will be built. We will also be visiting Vivian’s grave and will hold a mini memorial service. Thank you to everyone who has been praying for our team. We have been blessed by God’s favor and provision. We only lost two bags of luggage, and we should receive them tomorrow. Please pray for continued health for our team members and for our continued safety.

God Bless,

Lisa Prather

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Parents’ Attachment Style and the Adopted Child

As most adoptive parents are aware, a secure attachment is key to a child’s healthy development. Attachment is defined as a child’s bond to a caregiver based on the caregiver’s sensitivity and attunement to the child. The healthiest and strongest attachments are formed within the context of family: for children, the parent-child (especially mother-child) relationship, and for adults, the husband-wife relationship. Without proper attachments being formed in the early stages of life through proper parental attunement, a child in almost all cases will experience negative emotional repercussions, including a lack of self-regulation and deep insecurity.[1] For these children, the issues are not just the difficult behavior now, but the problems they will take into adulthood. Adults with insecure attachments often have marital and other relationship problems and difficulty attaching to their own children. These offspring are then affected, and a negative cycle is perpetuated. In fact, 72% of 21-year-olds retain the same attachment style they developed as newborns.[2]

Because of the profound impact that the parents’ attachment style has on a child’s emotional well-being, we as adoptive parents need to understand our own attachment style if we are to help our children, especially those with difficult histories. First, if married, we need to look at how we understand and interact with our spouse.[3] A strong marriage can help enhance our personal ability to attach, enhancing our attachment to our children. Studies show that an increase in marital discord, as well as insecurity, can lead to less competent parenting.  In addition, more marital detachment produces higher levels of detachment in the parent-child relationship.[4] A healthy marriage appears to be the strongest predictor of proper attachment between parents and their children.[5] Continue reading »

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2011 Together for Adoption National Conference

Registration opens today!

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Neurochemistry and the Adopted Child

Karyn Purvis, a professor at TCU and the author of The Connected Child, discusses how children’s brain neurochemistry can be negatively changed due to early life experiences, causing the child to have learning, social, and behavioral issues. Neurochemicals are the chemicals in the brain that send signals. So if the brain is not sending the right signals this can affect the brain directly as well as the child’s behavior.

There are six major risk factors to a child’s healthy brain development:

  • Difficult pregnancy:
    This can include drugs, alcohol, and a mother’s dealing with stressful situations.
  • Difficult birth:
    If the mother had a prolonged labor in which child was removed harshly by forceps, this can cause bleeding in capillaries in brain.
  • Early hospitalization:
    Usually an infant will have received less touch, disrupted time with mother, painful procedures, and overstimulation due to medical equipment and procedures. This can be experienced as neglect by the infant and the overstimulation can result in impaired sensory response. Continue reading »
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Adopting the HIV Positive Child, Part III: Telling Your Family and Friends

(Also read Adoption and HIV, Part 1: Know the Facts and Adopting the HIV Positive Child, Part II.)

You can study and learn lots about the HIV/AIDS, how a child may become HIV positive, how the child will fare, what medications are available, and even how contagious the child is to other family members. But all the facts still do not answer the questions that every prospective adoptive parent must ask: “What is it like to raise an HIV Child?”; “What does the future hold?”; “What will others think?“

Before you adopt a child—any child—it is only natural to consider what the response of friends and family will be. After all, this is one of the steps in the adoption process—telling others.

As with all adoptions, your family members may expect that you will adopt a child who will be like a birth child. But instead of announcing that you are adopting a healthy, newborn infant, you may then be explaining to them that you are adopting a child of another race, an older child, or a child with special needs. Continue reading »

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Adopting the HIV Positive Child, Part II

Because HIV infection is so serious, and children and adults alike are more prone to other infections, keeping a child strong and healthy is very important. And because children do not have the same reserves as adults, good nutrition is especially important for them.  In poorer countries and in orphanages, where children oftentimes receive less than optimum nutrition, their bodies are further compromised and more prone to infection.

That is why in other countries, orphanages dedicated to the care of HIV positive children receive extra funding  and attention so that the children can receive the extra medical and nutritional care that they need.

If you are considering adopting an HIV positive child, most likely you are adopting a child who is a true orphan and you will truly be giving a child the gift of life. We at Nightlight will be featuring children from Eastern Europe and Africa who are HIV positive. There are certainly considerations that need be taken before you and your family decide to adopt a child who is HIV positive and you will want to be well educated regarding HIV and AIDS in general and the issues you and a and HIV-positive child will face. Continue reading »

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Information on the Adoption Tax Credit

Below are some details that I received from the IRS relating to the adoption tax credit.

Documents substantiating the adoption or attempted adoption are required to be attached to the taxpayer’s return. Acceptable documents are identified in the September 2010 guidance and in IRS publications. In addition, the IRS may ask for proof of expenses if a return is under examination. All taxpayers are advised to keep receipts for expenses claimed on a tax return for at least three years. That applies whether the expenses are related to adoption, medical care, charitable giving, a business, or pretty much anything else. If the IRS asks for evidence to support an item claimed on a tax return and the taxpayer cannot offer any, the item may be reduced or disallowed. This is standard operating procedure.  The IRS has begun looking more closely at adoption claims. This is why you are now hearing about requests for verification of expenses. This relates to a statutory change that made the credit refundable. Before 2010, the credit merely offset taxes.  The adoption credit was modified by the Affordable Care Act (PL111-148, section 10909), and then by the December 17th tax extenders bill (PL111-312, section 1(b)). The IRS has not yet issued any official guidance on the latter modification. We’ve recently launched webpage, Adoptive Parents: Don’t Delay Your Adoption Credit Refund. It contains a great deal of information on the refund, including necessary documentation, FAQ’s, etc. Continue reading »

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Adoption and HIV, Part 1: Know the Facts

Many families are now choosing to adopt children who are HIV positive. The children can come from any country, but the majority of HIV positive children come from Africa.  About 3 million children in sub-Saharan Africa are infected with the HIV virus, and 90% of all children with HIV come from this region.

Because of parents dying from AIDS there are an estimated 25 million more children who are orphaned. [1] In Uganda, there are about 2 million orphans. Of those, 1.2 million have lost one or both parents to AIDS. [2] There are millions more who will become orphans.

In the U.S. and Western Europe, the incidence of HIV infection in children has been drastically reduced due to pregnant women taking what are called antiretroviral drugs, which lower the rate substantially of a mother’s passing on the infection to her unborn child.

Even in poorer countries, such as Uganda, this medication is available. However, many people, especially those in rural areas, do not have access to the medication.  Unlike children in Western countries, those in sub-Saharan Africa are much more likely to die from the infection. For these children who do become HIV infected, 50% will die before they reach their second birthday. In fact, the mortality rate due to HIV/AIDS in children under 5 years old has increased by 20-40%. [3] Continue reading »

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National Birthmother’s Day

Saturday, May 7th, the day before Mother’s Day, is National Birthmother’s Day, a day to honor the millions of brave and loving women placed their babies and children for adoption.

So how we can as adoptive parents honor our children’s birthmothers? It need not be very complicated. Just talking about the birthmother, sharing her name and celebrating the gift that she has given your family is one way to honor her.

I remember about 15 years ago, when my children were about five and eight years old, a friend in adoption made a video dedicated to birthmothers. The friend asked me and other adoptive families what were our children’s birthmother’s names so that she could put these names in the video. At the end of the videos, as the credits ran, the birthmothers were thanked and named. My children loved to watch the video and proudly shouted out the names of their birthmothers when the credits rolled. It was our way of honoring these women and reminding my daughters of the love their birthmothers had for them.

If you stay in regular communication with your child’s birthmother, you or your child can send a card as many do with our aunts, daughters, grandmothers, and any other mothers we know and love–even if they are not our mothers. Now that cards and notes can be sent via email, this can be a way for you and your child to send a loving message along with a few pictures to thank your child’s birthmother for choosing adoption.

So many children, whether adopted domestically or internationally, do not know how to contact their birthmothers—some do not even have her name. If you have no information about your child’s birthmother, honoring her on this special day can be a little more complicated, but it is important that in whatever way you can, you do so— It doesn’t  have to be limited to  a special holiday, but throughout the year.  Continue reading »

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First Snowflake Advocates for Embryo Adoption

The Streges at the White House

A recent post on Jim Daly’s Finding Home blog highlighted the work of Hannah Strege, the first ever Snowflake Embryo Adoption baby.  Daly explains that even though Hannah is still young, she has already had a huge impact advocating for the Snowflakes Program. At two, Hannah met with members of the U.S. Congress. and has met with President Bush and other government officials since.

Most recently Hannah spoke at the Nightlight Christian Adoptions Gala in March, focusing not only on the Snowflakes Program, but also on her faith.

Now I have to be honest and say this,” Hannah said. “When I was little and my mom mentioned Nightlight, I always thought of an actual Nightlight. But I notice now, that Jesus is shining His light on me to be a representative for Him.”

To read more about Hannah, pleas visit Finding Home. To learn more about Embryo Adoption, please visit Nightlight’s Snowflakes Embryo Adoption page.

 

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World Malaria Day

This year’s World Malaria Day theme—”Achieving Progress and Impact.” According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention http://www.cdc.gov/Features/WorldMalariaDay/ , the goal is to reach zero deaths by 2015.

That is quite a goal to reach in just 4 years because every 45 seconds a child dies from malaria. In Uganda alone, malaria kills about 320 children per day—that is more than six times the number of people dying in Uganda each day from AIDS.

Much work needs to be done, for malaria has not decreased. In fact, over the past 30 years it has increased three-fold. Some progress is being made, and in 32 of the 56 countries outside of Africa, the number of cases have  significantly decreased.

Malaria is both preventable and treatable for a very low cost.  A net to prevent malaria costs only $10, while treatment costs only about $8 .  You can make a contribution to bring nets to those who need them.  Go to: http://www.biteback.net/

For more information about  malaria go to: http://www.cdc.gov/malaria/

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Medical Providers and Therapists for Internationally Adopted Children

If you are adopting internationally, you know that there are two particularly critical times that you want professional medical assistance from someone who knows about international adoption: when you get a referral, and when you come home. Nightlight has compiled a state-by-state listing of Medical Providers that specialize in helping internationally adopted children. The list also includes Therapists we know of that have experience counseling families that have adopted internationally. This guide can be found at our International Adoption Resources page.

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